Bootleg Righteousness

I'm watching a movie with mom on television at the moment and it's very...Interesting. It's based on a true story as well.

A professional football player, husband and father loses his memory and has suffered brain damaged in a car accident. He was in a coma, eventually woke up, but didn't remember his family. The brain damage caused him to think he was playing football or something at times. He would go in violent rages and forget where he was. Sort of like people who have been in a war and have flashbacks.

Anyway, the family takes him back home immediately, against the doctors advice, thinking that he would be alright once they got him around familiar settings. So they bring him home and he starts going in these fits of rage and things. He isn't himself anymore because of his brain damage. So the family finally decides to send him away to get professional help.


Eventually he comes home, and acts like he's himself again. He appears to remember everything. He's acting sane and in his right mind. Only he isn't- His wife, as he's sleeping, finds cue cards that had fallen out of his clothes. Cards that tell him what to say and how to act.


Anyway, I thought this was quite similar to the Christian religion. We want immediate results, so we whip our cue card (the bible) and learn what to say, what to do, then try and do it. Only it can never fix the problem. It patches it up, and hides the problem. It does nothing to heal the brain damage. It's phony. It's like those plastic fruit bowls that my grandma uses to decorate her dining room table with. It looks like the real thing, but it's fake. A carved idol. A counterfeit. Bootleg righteousness.

Power in the Blood

"It is Done!"

"And He who was seated on the throne said, 'Behold, I am making all things new'. Also He said, 'It is done! I am the Alpha and the Omega, the Beginning and the End. To the thirsty I will give from the spring of the water of life without payment. The one who conquers will have this heritage and I will be his God and he will be My son.'"

I used to understand "It is done!" differently. Now I'm able to see it as an echo from the cross.

He is also, "The Beginning and the End." I believe this could possibly be reference to our salvation and sanctification. "From faith to faith." It is Christ through and through and there are no grounds for boasting.

I'm still wondering what this means in Revelation19:8:

"It was granted to her to clothe herself with fine linen, bright and pure- For the fine linen is the righteous deeds of the saints."

My guess is that the righteous deeds are our deeds done in faith? In other words, allowing Jesus to live through us. Because, as it's written, "Apart from faith, it is impossible to please God".

Anyone have any other insight on these two passages?

In Christ Alone

Either Make the Tree Good and It's Fruit Good, or Make the Tree Bad and It's Fruit Bad

"Faith without works is dead".

In the same way, I believe works without faith are dead.

Works are the effect, not the cause. God is our focus and our love. Not works. The works are a natural over flow. Which is why the bible refers to it as the fruit. Fruit grows naturally on a branch when it is connected to the vine.

"Grapes are not gathered from thorn bushes, nor figs from thistles." We can't be alive if we are dead. Good works don't come from striving, but being. Apart from Him, we can do nothing. If we don't abide in Him, we are withered.

I've always heard this as if I don't produce fruit for God, then I will be withered. But Jesus says exactly the opposite. If I try and produce fruit, I will be, "cast out as a branch and withered."

"A good person, out of his good treasure, brings forth good."

Good fruit is suppose to be (super)-natural from the indwelling life of Christ. How else could we, "run and not grow weary"?

Bad Day

This week has been pretty stressful. Mom broke her arm completely in two and I've just felt completely sinful.

I may be the biggest contradiction in the world. I pretend to be Christian around my brothers and sisters, but when I'm not around them I get angry at things they say.

I'm very intolerant against the slightest hint of legalism. And I hate that. I will dissect every word Christians say to make sure it's in line with the gospel. I don't want to hate my brothers and sisters. I don't want to sin..I don't want to be selfish or lazy. But I find myself doing it more often than not.

I've lost focus of Christ today. I had the thoughts that I must not be a Christian because I'm so evil.

My friends pray for me and all I do is think evil of them because I'm afraid they're going to scare me with legalism.

I try not to allow myself to feel condemned, but the weight of my sin bears down on me so hard sometimes.

What is Repentance?

I was questioning this the past few days in my mind.

I had always questioned this, because of how repentance is defined by the Church. It just contradicts something else I hear from the Church, which is "You don't clean yourself up and then come to God."

Also, it just doesn't make sense with the freeness of the gospel to me at all. Now, I believe in repentance, but I do not believe it means "turning away from sin". I'm sorry, that just doesn't make sense.

If repentance is, as they say, "Not just feeling sorry for your sin, but turning away from it", then no one has ever completely repented because no one is ever sinless. So there must be something deeper here.

Also, I'm reminded of what Jesus said in Luke chapter 13.

"Do you think that these Galileans were worse sinners than all the other Galileans, because they suffered in this way? No, I tell you; but unless you repent, you will all likewise perish. Or those eighteen on whom the tower in Siloam fell and killed them: do you think that they were worse offenders than all the others who lived in Jerusalem? No, I tell you; but unless you repent, you will all likewise perish."

Which brings me to the ridiculous theories, some so-called Christians have come up with about Hurricane Katrina in New Orleans. Some have said these people suffered in that way because of "all their sin". Do we even read the Bible? Having eyes to see, do we still not see?

The sin is unbelief. This, I think, is the sin we repent of. Otherwise, if repentance were turning away from sin, then how much sin must you turn away from before you're able to come to Jesus for salvation? Excuse me, but I thought Jesus was the Physician. I thought He was the Savior. But you're saying I must reach some unknown level of sinlessness before I can be saved? I thought you just said that we don't clean ourselves up in order to come to God?

If you think I'm saying It's ok to sin, you've missed my point. My point is that sanctification does not start until after salvation. And this is an ongoing process. - Edit: If anyone has any information on how to speed up this process, then please tell me.

This is just another reason I think people are hindered from coming to Christ. People have put cost on salvation. People cannot quit sinning. Even if they did, you still have the problem of spiritual death. So even if they do eventually learn to muzzle their sin, then what good is that if they're dead on the inside? First let them come to Christ and receive Life.

I may be wrong on this, but I just don't see how todays definition of repentance fits with the gospel.