Monday, February 1, 2010

I'm not the person I imagine myself to be.

I feel so vulnerable and weak.
I don't know everything.
I don't know much at all.
I'm not all that wise.
I'm just a kid.

There are so many times I want my Father, but I run to broken cisterns.
It isn't a guilt thing. I just wish I always chose what I really and truly desired.

It's strange. Sometimes I desire my relationships here on earth so bad, but I also desire to be with Him.

I feel pulled apart at the moment. I'm just writing for the sake of saying how I feel.


3 comments:

The Lewis Family said...

Understand totally! Find it frustrating. It's like I am not seeing clearly and I know I am not seeing clearly and yet I feel helpless to do anything about it. Even helpless to ask. . . Did you check out the video Dan put together? He posted it on facebook a few weeks ago and I just posted it on my blog page.

Matthew Campbell said...

I'm sorry, Becca. I feel too weak to even try to keep my head above water. I'm sure that it will pass, but right now, it isn't pleasant.

I loved the video though. Where is it on Facebook? I wanted to repost it on mine as well. That was very, very good.

The Lewis Family said...

umm, look down on the left side of our profile. it is somewhere there labeled 'nem.wmv'. It is also on youtube, which is clearer and larger to read the words: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wD7-XAeR2AM

or

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wD7-XAeR2AM&feature=player_embedded