We had an amazing day at our home group today. Amazing. I was so encouraged to simply "be". To quit trying to act so holy in front of people. Especially in front of people I have wronged. I have no right to puff myself up to be something I'm not. Especially in front of people I've committed horrible sins against.
I'm not saying I ruin wild, sin, and do whatever either. I'm simply saying I need to be myself. I need to quit analyzing every word, action, and thought when I'm with someone. I just need/want to be their friend. Neither do I want to do this in order to convert them. Thats also the wrong motivation. Of course, I would love to see someone saved. I wouldn't be much of a believer in what Jesus said if I didn't. But I refuse to proselytize anyone. I want to be free and I want them to be free. I want to be free from oppression. Simply freedom to soak in the love of God and allow Him to love others through me. I want the real stuff. I want simplicity. I want disorganization. I want to be imperfectly perfect. I want to be a fumbler and a bumbler so that people (including myself) can see that it isn't me, but God.