Thursday, June 21, 2007

The Blues

This week has been pretty bad. I had just gotten over my fever when I get hives. And I got them bad. They are easing up now I think, but they were covering my whole body. I was so miserable...So I've been lazy with prayer and reading the Bible since I got sick.

I feel so condemned again, like God is angry with me or something. I feel so anxious lately, and very bored. Not a good combination.

I know it's grace and not works, but I have been having fears again lately that maybe I don't have a sincere faith. I guess it's just because I haven't been doing much lately since I've been sick, then I got the hives. I just need a break. =(


Alan Knox said...


I came to your blog from Joel's a few days ago. I'm excited about what God is teaching you. I know that you don't need a lecture, so I'm not going to give you one. I can tell you that I've been where you are. What did I learn? His grace is sufficient.


Joel Brueseke - Grace Roots said...

Hi Matthew,

Indeed as Alan says, His grace is sufficient. Rather than God being angry with you, I believe He wants you to know how much He loves you and how much of Himself He wants to give to you.

Jesus' words in Matt 11 show us that God wants to give rest to our souls, not stress and fear.

Matt 11:28-30
Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light."

I like the way it's worded in The Message:

Matt 11:28-30
"Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you'll recover your life. I'll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me — watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won't lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you'll learn to live freely and lightly."

(Emphasis mine). Praying for you, friend. I hope your body gets to healing and your mind gets the rest it needs. :)

Daelon said...

Thanks so much guys, I really appreciate the encouragement. I really needed it this morning. I always need reminders of God's love. I thanked God for the both of you. =)